Rival That

Monday marked the 37^th time tennis pros Novak Djokovic and Rafa Nadal played each other in a championship. In the 45 years since tennis went professional, no two players have faced each other this many times, though John McEnroe and Ivan Lendle came close some decades back.

The U.S. Open had me thinking about several things, mostly rivalries and second chances. Do rivalries make us stronger or does the constant reminder that someone out there is capable of exploiting our weaknesses only add to the anxiety?

Growing up the youngest and the only girl amongst two older brothers meant a constant battle to prove I could be one of the boys. Every week it was some new challenge of who could bike the furthest, skate the hardest or defeat the most villains on Contra.

To this day I still get anxiety around Easter time because the family Easter egg hunt always consisted of my brothers watching me collect the eggs and then the worst of atomic wedgies until I surrendered my basket.

Things calmed down a little once we all grew older, gained unique interests and out grew Easter egg hunts. However the need to compete always stayed with us. I believe it was that early rivalry that truly helped me succeed in high school and become such a driven student at Texas A&M University-Corpus Christi.

Now I enjoy surrounding myself with intelligent and driven individuals because I believe it challenges me to compete, for lack of a better word, and to also push myself to higher standards.

Interestingly enough I read The Inner Game of Tennis by W. Timothy Gallwey a few years back to help me compete in UIL guitar competitions and learned a few valuable tips for competition in everyday life.

I gave up long ago playing the number game. I’m sure you’re familiar with the game. The person sitting next to you asking how the exam went for you, while explaining what a hard time they had in order to illicit a response about your grade so that they can then proceed to boast about how their grade was higher. That game.

We are for the most part, what we claim to be. Those who practice positive self-talk tend to perform better, work harder and achieve more than those who criticize themselves on mistakes. 

Maintaining relaxed focus is something Gallwey explains beautifully in his book. Think of it like riding a bike- something you never forget. While riding a bike the cyclist rarely thinks about how poorly they are peddling or how they could improve their posture. During the ride the cyclist simply lets their body carry out the task it has done so many times before while letting their mind wander.

Next time the competition gets stiff and the rivalry has your anxiety level at record highs, keep calm and ride your metaphorical bike it will be all right.